DISCOVERING FRIENDS

There’s a certain thing that needs not to be abstract to stay in our heads nor to be related to us in order for it to dwell within the confines of our sensitive hearts.

Still quite a blur?

It’s just something that stays as it is, and we value this as friendship. Without friends, how are we to survive this specious world? How are we even to live? So just face it, from the most ragtag to the most refined of circles, when you find who your friends really are, you stick with them – and that’s just a natural tendency.

I am to give you some simple indications (together with a few of my colleagues’ ideas) about friendship. But hey! Don’t let me lose you on that, these aren’t the hackneyed “friends accept who you are” sort of stuff; these are some minute facts you probably know but fail to realize about you and your friends. Wouldn’t it be nice to let the subtle surface at times? Get to know what really happens in your circle, while doing the things you love to do together!

There’s a golden rule of conformity. “Hey! We’re going to the mall, wanna come?” – more often than not, these aren’t really questions. If you’re friends with this person, then there’s no misdirection; you know exactly it’s a command in a philosophically erroneous interrogative form. I eat this, you eat that. I do this, you do it too. What’s so good about this though is to know that it is not peer pressure. It’s peer pressure when you’re around “peers”, but with real friends, it’s always just a compliance-leveraged choice. The simple reason behind this is that you cannot afford losing a moment where you know you’d enjoy-- big-time. And the fact you’re doing this with some of the best people to ever exist in your world, why then a lone path? It’s worth relishing.

You don’t want any of your friends hurt, except by you. Oh, we just have to admit this no matter how childish it seems. When you tease someone in the group, you can even take it to extreme fronts. But when somebody else does, even with just the most minor of all offenses, THE GAME IS ON. Mess with my friends, get ready for war. Heartbreaks are inclusive in this case, perhaps even the most dominant. When it comes to our friends, it becomes too natural of us to act as if we have the monopoly of what is right (in terms of being protective) and what is “justly” offensive (in terms of pissing them ourselves) for them.

You “hate” the same people. This is something unexplainable but quite understandable. It is possible that the offense done by a person to one friend causes all the other friends to hate the offending party. However, there are cases that some mysterious force must be acting upon your group that you suddenly hate these certain people. Or, it might be explained by the shared similarities no matter how small it appears to be.

You tolerate the flaws of one, as long as you take pleasure in them yourself. “Hey this is cute, let’s buy and cut budgets for next month!” or “Hey, I feel like quenching with frap, let’s go to SB!” Yes yes, everyday could be a cheat day with friends. Sometimes, instead of helping our friends grow out of their comfort zones, we even spoil them, as long as we enjoy them ourselves. This is commonplace found in activities such as chillin’, boy hunting and delaying plans meant to direct to productivity.

There you go with the cavalier attitude. When friends get together, expect all levels of anxiety drop down to zero and witness confidence spike up the sky. When this happens, most groups even tend to mute the whole world around to the point of becoming too rowdy. Also, most take full responsibility of this in case of unsolicited “managerial advice” coming from a staff of whatever restaurant you’re hanging in or from a plain disturbed customer seated next. What follows is either the temporary silence, or you talk about how bad the staff member or the customer was for being too onion-skinned. Ha ha! Everything just feels safe and right around friends, oui?

There could never be such a trivial thing. “Why were you up so late?” “Where did you get this?” “Have you eaten?” “What happened to that when (blahblahblah)?” “Don’t guzzle down the whole Coke” “What was that?” “Hey, you were gonna say something; say it.” Another nod! Friends indeed, could just be pretty much inquisitive, they insist too much with things they want you to do and they want to know. But what’s so bad about that? It’s like having a properly age-bracketed brother or sister. Adventures always await when it comes to new knowledge and experience, and where else could you best get that? Of course, from a friend who just won’t drop a topic!

You now know how to say sorry. Growing up, you usually lose the lenience of saying the word sorry. But once you’re tied up with your friends, you can say this countless of times no matter what side you’re on in a conflict. You may be right or wrong in many levels, but you always end up saying sorry. This is because your friends proved you that losing a fight is way better than losing a friend. Sometimes though, saying this isn’t even necessary, a hug does the work! And I know you know: you just realized that because it does happen!

Friends could be fuzzier than ever, but we still get them. There’s always a time when even you, yourself can’t understand what’s happening within. When such a moment transpires, you radiate it. It’s irritating, but who stays to remain quiet as you do? Who stays to blame every single thing which contributes entirely nothing to a misfortune? It’s just friends. We’ll never always get along well with them, but at times we don’t get them, we actually do, just by not getting it.

These are just few of the many more you most probably know but never actually realize about you and your friends, until now (with much hope and crossed toe fingers). I’m sure you have your own shares of accounts like those mentioned, and I’m sure you’re doing great with friends especially if you unconsciously practice all of the above. Keep it up!

Written by Trojan Pabico

Art by MJ Catacutan

Writer twitter: @truejanwar

          Trojan Troy Pabicoinstagram: @trojanpabico

Universe-dependent cheese-gorging demigod
Fancies wading in bottomless iced teas
A self-proclaimed eccentric rhapsody, it figures, right

Web Manager twitter: @mjctctn

          Michael John "MJ" Catacutan

I don't go with the flow, I make my own
Sleep is my partner but stress is my mistress
Jack of all trades, master of none
^ Apparently, likes using compound sentences